.sinful pleasures

A confession of a couple of quite bad addictions I happen to suffer from and don't even bother to get treatment for.

1- Shisha (Hookah) 

This is an addiction that was conceived in happiness and leisure, raised in rage and depression, has grown to be my only refuge and is consuming every last part of me (including my honesty).

First time I have huffed a puff was approximately 4 years ago, when the females in my family were all around, and new beautiful bonds were forming, along with all these sweet moments it was introduced by an older and rather awesome one of us. But things happen and people depart, physically of course, we cannot ever be detached emotionally, we integrate each other. I am not assuming, but entirely positive that I took off the habit by myself because subconsciously, it reminded me of a much better, much simpler time, it's like I have extracted the parts of those memories that is the easiest to recreate and went ahead with it.

The bad part is, I am not being able to let go, I have tried, financial crisis didn't stop me, physical damage didn't stop, disapproval of loved ones didn't effect me.. I don't know what else well, and I don't want to get to the moment where I no longer have a choice.

My father was a heavy smoker, and he quit due to a severe illness he encountered, my uncle passed away because of his tobacco consumption, this is exactly what I do not want, I want to quit while I am still strong, but I am honest enough with myself to admit that I do not see it happening anytime soon...




To be continued..

.little seedlings of hope

When i was almost 10 years old, I decided to take off agriculture and see how that'll turn out, for no reason other than having too much time on my hands at that time and wanting to fill it with something useful, which is surprising, giving that now, I'm doing the exact opposite.
However, that didn't last long, everyone sure knew how bring me down by convincing me that I should seriously give it up since the soil i was planting in was layered above sub cement ( jeez ), and thanks to the abundance of worms that lead me to having an unbelievable fear of them till this very day, the looks of those earth worms are not meant to be forgotten :'(

I completely forgot about planting anything there, i knew i planted a lot and as a child it's either instant results or it didn't happen.

One seed in particular though, which location I so specifically remember, managed to make it, and it grew so beautifully, in the past couple of years I ignored it because the child that apparently didn't follow the path the seed took to grow up, was thinking : either gigantic tree, or it didn't happen.

But this gorgeous peach tree, is now screaming : you don't want to come closer, your loss, it's so beautiful, and I'm very pleased :)

Look !

And for 63 years now, a holy tree that was planted in our hearts and will forever grow, has been stolen, and is craving light, not from sunshine, but fire, knowing that it's the only way to take back what's rightfully ours.

God bless you Palestine, my everlasting love ..

نهار العصر ثوار 

وأحلام يزينها دم الزيتون والغار 

.the current addiction

Beautiful music, a voice to kill for, an amazingly gorgeous and inspiring young woman. She is the British singer/songwriter Adele Adkins, and she is my new addiction.

Introduced to her voice thorough her latest hit Rolling In The Deep , he voice literally stunned me, I had to look up the song in search for the singer behind all that beauty, while at it, I had the privilege to listen to several others by her, apparently the song that blew my mind was just a jewel in her talent crown.

On a completely unrelated note, this was my favorite show when i was a little girl, Madelene


We love our bread
We love our butter
But most of all
We love each other